STUFF TO MAKE YOU FEEL OLD

1975: Long hair

2005: Longing for hair

1975: KEG

2005: EKG

1975: Acid rock

2005: Acid reflux

1975: Moving to California because it's cool

2005: Moving to Arizona because it's warm

1975: Tryin to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor

2005: Trying NOT to look like MarlonBrando or Liz Taylor

1975: Seeds and stems

2005: Roughage

1975: Hoping for a BMW

2005: Hoping for a BM

1975: Going to a new, hip joint

2005: Receiving a new hip joint

1975: Rolling Stones

2005: Kidney Stones

1975: Being called into the principal's office

2005: Calling the principal's office

1975: Screw the system

2005: Upgrade the system

1975: Disco

2005: Costco

1975: Parents begging you to get your hair cut

2005: Children begging you to get their heads shaved

1975: Passing the drivers' test

2005: Passing the vision test

1975: Whatever

2005: Depends

Just in case you weren't feeling too old today, this will certainly change things..

The people who are starting college this fall across the nation were born in 1987.

They are too young to remember the first space shuttle blowing up on liftoff.

Their lifetime has always included AIDS.

Bottle caps have always been screw off and plastic.

The CD was introduced the year they were born.

They have always had an answering machine.

They have always had cable.

They cannot fathom not having a remote control.

Jay Leno has always been on the Tonight Show.

Popcorn has always been cooked in the microwave.

They never took a swim and thought about Jaws.

They can't imagine what hard contact lenses are.

They don't know who Mork was or where he was from.

They never heard: "Where's the Beef?", "I'd walk a mile for a Camel", or "de plane, Boss, de plane".

They do not care who shot J. R. and have no idea who J. R. even is.

McDonald's never came in Styrofoam containers.

They don't have a clue how to use a typewriter.

Do you feel old yet?